The 4th Step- Part 4

The jungle had been there for centuries, standing in hushed silence. The thick pillars of stone and steel reached towards the sky as if to claim it as its own. Overgrown with trees and shrubbery, the pillars actually seemed to become a part of the nature surrounding them. But now, the life which usually teemed in the hollow innards of these very pillars held its breath, as if waiting for a verdict from the waiting King at their doorstep. But for the King of the Fae, this silence was deafening. For it was filled with screams of pain and anger. The darkness within the pillars threatened to suck him in, into an eternal abyss of grief and guilt.

He was not yet ready to face those screams. If he stepped into that unhallowed ground, he would surely be overwhelmed. But he was the King. A King could not afford to be overthrown by something as insignificant as this. He had done this for the greater good of the world. His subjects had flourished because of this. He had served his punishment as he spent the last few millennia bound in that coffin of moss and earth. He had been forgiven for his righteous crimes.

Hadn't he?

Beset by worries and troubles, a thought came to his mind. A thought from another, a being beyond such mortal woes. A being that encompassed each and every soul in this beautiful world. Nuadh'on. The Spirit Tree. He thought that Nuadh'on would not come to him again. 

"Forgiveness must first come from within."

Hearing this whisper in his mind, quiet yet projecting at the same time, made the King stop his pacing. Clarity came to his mind. He knew what to do. To be forgiven, first he must face his past and accept it. That was the only way.

The King settled down onto the ground he loved so much. The touch of the earth brought peace to his mind. Unknowingly, as he closed his brilliant golden eyes, his hand clutched some dirt, holding on tight to it. Suddenly, the very aroma of his surroundings changed. An earthly aroma permeated the air, bringing with it images of spring showers and cherry blossoms flourishing, of chirping birds and trotting animals, of forest floors carpeted with red and gold, of a frigid and barren land slowly flushing with the green. It brought images of life. 

With a deep breath and a quiet, smouldering resolve, the King exploded with light once more. But this time, his soul did not soar on the winds of this gorgeous world, but rather floated on the tides of time, moving towards his past. When he had been unbound. When he had committed horrors like no other. 

Long ago, the Hallowed King of the Fae lived a free life. He was King in nothing other than name and spirit. For the Fae were a free people, living as they liked alongside the nature surrounding them. In this, they had been blessed in a stronger connection than most to Nuadh'on, the Spirit Tree. The almighty being who connected everyone in this world, encompassing all parts of it with his roots and branches. His embrace brought life and his caress brought death. The world lived within him, and he lived within everything in the world. With him acting as the guide for everyone, the world resided harmoniously. It was peace and prosperity incarnate. 

Until one day, a new race was born. Simple-minded at first, they developed at an astonishing pace. Building new devices, creating new art forms, evolving new languages. They did it all. They lived in harmony with everything, as was intended by Nuadh'on. But there was something inherently wrong with them. For them, satisfaction was never achieved. They wanted to be the best at everything. This ambition helped them grow, but even as they grew, something broke inside. Slowly, they started ravaging this world, tearing it apart for the resources. Once, where they had been a perfect example for the other races, now they were nothing but outcasts. But still, Nuadh'on touched their lives. They were like his children after all, and all children stumble on the path of life. For once, Nuadh'on was wrong, however unimaginable it may seem.

The Fae had always been favoured ones, even as this new race built themselves further and further up. Soon enough, their envy reached its limit. And then, the slaughter began.

The Fae were brutally murdered. None were spared, not even the young and the frail. In only a few days, thousands had been killed mercilessly. The King heard of this and felt an emotion he thought would never come to him. Wrath. Not the boiling hot one. No, this was as cold as the northern wastelands. This was fury incarnate.

So he exacted revenge. An eye for an eye. Even as they begged and cried for their lives, stating that they had nothing to do with the massacre of his people, he would not listen. Weeks past, but this fury stayed within his heart. No Fae would approach him, and when he went to meet them, they would not even look him in the eyes. But that race still lived. He could feel it pulsing within him, a desire to wipe them all out once and for all. So at the end of his third month hunting them, he killed the last one, even as autumn turned into cold, barren winter. A wasteland without life. He had single-handedly caused the extinction of an entire race. 

The sorrow was overwhelming.

Now, he bore the brunt of Nuadh'on's anger and was bound for his crimes. His connection was weakened, but not fully taken away. And it was so that the King of the Fae was lowered into the earth, not to be seen for millennia. 

The King slowly opened his eyes and found that he had been holding his breath. 

"Forgiveness must first come from within."

The words rang out within him again, and he found that even though the sorrow did not recede, there was light now. A small pinprick of light, of salvation. He could not right his wrongs, but he could accept them for what they were.

He stood and walked into the jungle of those giant pillars, the darkness receding around him. The abyss would exist, but he would not let it take him. With tears staining his cheeks, he walked forward, resolve strengthening with each step. Finally, he reached the centre. Here, he stood, looking to the heavens with a quiet peace spreading across his face. And he whispered to himself.

"I forgive myself."